Teens and Tech: Our Kids Are Growing Up Wired and How To Tackle Screen Addiction

As technology continues to advance, our lives become easier, but does it?  We notice the ease, but many of us are witnessing the side-effects of our technology dependent culture.  According to the Cleveland Clinic, social media has the ability to cause euphoria, but also increase anxieties and/or insecurities.  How can it be that social media can simultaneously be both constructive and destructive?  What are the mechanisms responsible for creating both the rush of happiness in our teenagers and drop in their self-esteem?  The juxtaposition of the effects of social media creates an interesting conversation about how electronics are effecting our teens. 

What is screen addiction?

Screen addiction creates mental health problems and behavioral challenges.  In addition, it is commonly co-occurring disorder which means that the person is suffering from at least 2 mental health disorders at once. They could be diagnosed with anxiety, depression, ADHD, and/or Autism along with an addiction to the screen.

 These symptoms may present themselves if your teen’s screen time usage is negatively affecting their ability to function.  The criteria to classify a screen dependency disorder is 5/9 of the following symptoms:

· Preoccupation/Obsession

· Withdrawal

· Tolerance has been established.  Now the child needs more time on the screen to satisfy their need.

· Loss of control: attempts of stopping or reducing screen time are unsuccessful

· Loss of interests outside of screen time.

· Excessive use: despite negative outcomes.

· Deception: deceives family members or others about the amount of time spent.

· Escape from negative moods (hopelessness, guilt, trauma.)

· Risk/functional impairment: jeopardized or lost a job or relationship due to too much screen use.

Growing up digital

There is one thing that is certain, social media connections are not the same as real life social connections.  Author of “iGen: Why Today’s Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy-and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood-and What That Means for the Rest of Us,” Dr. Jean M. Twenge, stated in a presentation at ClarityCon Reimagined, “the number of teens who get together with their friends nearly every day dropped by over 40%.  More teens are spending their free time along in their room and on their phones, computers or games.”  According to Dr. Twenge:

 “All screen activities are linked to less happiness, and all off screen activities are linked to more happiness.”

She continue by stating, “eighth graders who spend 10 or more hours a week on social media are 56% more likely to say they are unhappy than those who devote less time to social media.  Admittedly, 10 hours a week is a lot, but those who spend 6-9 hours a week on social media are still 47% more likely to say they are unhappy than those who use social media even less.  The opposite is true of in-person interactions.  Those who spend an above-average amount of time with their friends in person are 20% less likely to say they’re unhappy than those who hang out for a below-average amount of time.” 

By modeling the prioritization of face-to-face connections, we are able to show our kids what we value.  For example, spend time at the dinner table (without phones, TV, and other media distractions) and ask each other questions.

Preferring virtual reality

Escapism is a common behavior linked to screen addiction.  This is one of the unhealthy ways teens today are dealing with stress. Although gaming, scrolling, and posting can make your teen feel less bad in the moment, its positive effects do not extend past that. As soon as the positive effects of “checking out” via screen time wears off, they are back to feeling miserable again. In addition, it causes more harm in the long run by worsening existing mental health problems and creating new, additional problems.

If you teen is showing significant impairment or distress in any of these 6 areas, it is time to seek support for a treatment plan on how you and your teen can cope with screen addiction, and the secondary issues (depression, anxiety, trauma, ect.) that are worsened by screen addiction.

Teens can have impairment in:

·     Relationships with friends/social dysfunction

·     School

·     Activities

·     Family life

·     Sleep

·     Appetite

Dopamine Addiction

Our teens have the ability to record their lives (literally) at their fingertips. Social media apps like Tik Tok, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter make it easy for teens to stay “connected,” but also are a wormhole that can disconnect them from reality for hours at a time.  This tech obsessed culture make it hard to truly be living in the moment.  Social media has taught us that we must document our lives.  Beyond that, teens equate the amount of “likes” they get to determine the quality of these moments that they curate on their social media pages. 

These notifications, comments, and likes that give us positive feedback, create a dopamine reaction that leverages the same neural circuitry “used by slot machines and cocaine to keep us using their products,” states Harvard Medical School research technician Trevor Haynes in his piece “Dopamine, Smartphones & You: A battle for your time” (Haynes, 2018).

Over time, the excessive release of dopamine leads to over-stimulation which can make it hard for real life experiences to match the level of stimulation that social media, video games, and other forms of technological media offers us.  When we become accustomed to that level of stimulation, real life can become boring because it doesn’t offer us the same level of excitement and instant gratification. No wonder it seems like our kids our addicted to their phones...  because they are. 

Expectation vs. Reality

With our smart devices becoming so embedded into our culture, parents wonder how they should set boundaries for their children? 

Pediatricians generally recommend the following guideline for teenagers to be generally no more than 2 hours of screen time per day not including homework.

In contrast, The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reports that teens spend an average amount of 8 hours a day on their devices-a despairingly excessive amount of time compared to what is being recommended. 

With such a large delta between expectation and reality, parents are left with the daunting task of being the bearer of bad news.  Although early intervention is ideal, it’s never too late to provide rules and boundaries to help them develop a healthy relationship with screens.  When giving a teen access to their own personal phones, it is imperative for parents to discuss the responsibilities and risks of screen time.  The parents ability to communicate “balance” is key.

Children who can’t self regulate turn into adults who can’t self-regulate

To support the effort of parents, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that parents develop a family media use plan.  A useful tool was created on Healthychildren.org that can help parents guide their teens on appropriate screen time practices. 

Simply banning screens, may backfire.  Instead try a mindful approach to media, says Jon Lasser, phD, a psychologist at Texas State University and co-author, with Mike Brooks, phD, of the 2018 book “Tech Generation: Raising Balanced Kids in a Hyper-Connected World.”

The negotiation of limits and boundaries is a healthy way for families to manage screen time.  “ It is important for kids to develop the capacity to self-regulate,” Lasser says. Furthermore, when parents try and micromanage screen time for children, they may be inadvertently interfering with the self-regulatory development.  They recommend that you have your teen come up with a compromise or create a pie chart of their day showing where they intend to spend their time and discuss having a healthy balance between “lean time” and “screen time.”

We know copious amount of sugar is unhealthy and a small child would not be able to self-regulate what is a healthy amount of sugar for them.  Parents can apply the same principle to teen and screen time.  We cannot expect our teens to understand how their brains are being affected by media when we hand them their first phone.  It is our job as parents to set clear rules and expectations around technology. Parents should first and foremost have the ability to be about to communicate to their children in a way that their teens do not feel attacked or judged.  We need to provide a safe space for our children to live in because the world of tech is not easy to navigate and will not care about their well-being.

Filling the void

Another proactive step for parents to take include helping their teen fill the void.  If you take away screen time and leave your teen to figure out what to then do with that free time, it can often feel like a punishment.  Instead, parents should help replace that time with something positive:

·  Spend time at the park or beach and connect with nature.

·  Start a garden that your teen can nurture.

·  Get inspired by different cultures and cook a meal together.

·  Find DIY projects that will give your teen a sense of accomplishment.

·  Enroll your teen in a self-defense class to build self-esteem.

Most of all find what works for you and your teen.  Get inspired by their interests and find ways to nurture their curiosities in real life!

Model healthy behavior

The advancement of technology has also made it so easy to access people that is has become culturally acceptable to expect instant responses when contacting someone.  One way parents can model a healthy relationship with technology is by making it a point to make themselves less available to their bosses or co-workers outside of working hours and instead prioritizing spending that time with friends, family, or enjoying a hobby.

Another important habit to implement at home is creating screen-free bedrooms.  According to a medical review by Dr. Abhinav Singh, blue light can trick our brains into thinking it’s still daylight and therefore disrupt our circadian rhythms leaving us feeling alert instead of tired.  Dr. Singh continues to note that “chronic misalignment circadian rhythms can also lead to many negative health impacts.” Notification sounds and other personal device disturbances can also impact sleep by causing one or multiple night awakenings.

They are many studies that show the link between excessive screen time and various mental and physical health issues.  These include depression, obesity, behavioral issues, anxiety, and poor social skills. 

What is the main take-away? Practice mindfulness and find balance in your own life to help your teen have a healthy relationship with screens. Become a good model for your teens and show them that life can be even morefulfilling on the other side of the screen. 

Works Cited

51 critical Cyberbullying statistics in 2020. (n.d.). Retrieved March 05, 2021,  from https://www.broadbandsearch.net/blog/cyber-bullying-statistics

Anderson, M., & Jiang, J. (2020, August 14). Teens, social media & Technology 2018. Retrieved March 05, 2021, from https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2018/05/31/teens-social-media-technology-2018/ 

Goldstein MS, LMFT, Virginie. “Impact of Screen Addiction and How to Handle It.” Online Parent Education Series. Online Parent Education Series, 26 Apr. 2023, Remote. 

“Infographics - Screen Time vs. Lean Time.” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 29 Jan. 2018, https://www.cdc.gov/nccdphp/dnpao/multimedia/infographics/getmoving.html. 

Legner, Luke. “Kids' Screen Time: How Much Is Too Much?” OSF HealthCare Blog, 22 Apr. 2022, https://www.osfhealthcare.org/blog/kids-screen-time-how-much-is-   too-much/. 

Pappas, Stephanie. “What Do We Really Know about Kids and Screens?”  Monitor on Psychology, American Psychological Association, 30 June 2022, https://www.apa.org/monitor/2020/04/cover-kids-screens. 

Rouse, Sydney. “The Impact of Technology on Teens' Mental Wellness: Clarity CGC.” Clarity Child Guidance Center, 9 Mar. 2021, https://www.claritycgc.org/too-  much-of-a-good-thing-the-impact-of-technology-on-teens-mental-wellness/. 

Twenge, J. M. (2018, March 19). Have smartphones destroyed a generation? Retrieved March 05, 2021, from https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/09/has-the-smartphone-destroyed-a-generation/534198/